Hope
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The optimist in me has realized Toxic positivity doesn’t work Sometimes, there is no silver lining To a bad experience that we’ve heard I’ve learned it’s more effective to listenIdentifying someone’s feelings insteadHolding space to hear them out Without a resolution at the helm This is what I’ve longed for myself To be treated with decency Without the threat of being
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The urge to compete comes naturally Craving the rush it brings Though, more than anything I like the responsibility it springs Wearing a big ol’ shiny crown A white sash with your county’s name Suddenly people listen to you Curious to learn from where you came Oddly enough, I speak to audiences Without donning this gaudy charade I share my unconventional background In hopes
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Here I am, once againThe last one in the pack Worked hard to make it far And yet, I’m way off track Graduating college seemed Like a true mark of success Giving me this coveted ticket To exclusive access To those who’d never talk to me Without this damn degree I need it to play this silly gameThe first in my family
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In undue time, I’ve realized My fate is in my hands Took the reigns, paved the way Not afraid to take a stand Stronger than I’ve ever been I’m learning what I needHow to walk and talk and dress These skills help me succeed Earning money on my ownI’m learning to invest In myself, my education Nurturing a future nest For too
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Loving life in college My goals now crystal clear I want to create a life for myself That makes my background disappear Being broke as broke can be Makes it hard to grasp How to survive these next four years And keep my future plans in tact Life at home is flailing Mom is angry at me for Choosing to be with my
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Stability on the horizon Mom’s moved out on her own In this healthy relationship She is in a brand new zone A total and complete 180With a San Francisco cop Our past fading in the distance Visits with Dad often a flop Thankful for the decision To let me stay inside Of my grandparents loving home While I academically thrive “You must come
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Reminiscing about the crowded hallsNavigating a world so unknownI cry quietly in Grandma’s bedroom I’d be better off alone These kids know what is in and outPlacing me into a box I can’t see Labeling it with their judgements Slapping them on top of me Rather than join the crowdI grow appreciation for my new surroundings It beats being
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Holding a credit card feels surreal For this I can seeA tangible symbol of Dad’s possibilities It’s subtle weight carries a sort of prestige Stark contrast to my immediate surroundings Lining my finger along its sides I carefully lay it flat, admiring the font typeIt represents a future, one I can see Maybe we will live in a house One where
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Living amongst the shadows Of other children needing more An unexpected comfort Allowing me to explore Once your spotlight found me I felt nervous to my core Rather than show fear I’d paint a smile, my cheeks sore Fragments of my reality Disguised by your playful insanity You’d joke, we’d laugh, follow along The truth hidden within this cacophonous song Not once do I
Sarah Lopez 